Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Acute Anxiety

I was speaking with someone recently who asked me if I had ever heard of fainting goats. I thought he was kidding (no pun). He said, for real....when they get scared, their defense mechanism is to faint...something akin to playing dead. I thought this was a fairly ineffective counter measure to an attack. Something Darwin should be able to clean up in a single generation. I envisioned finding a herd of such animals...myself armed with a video camera for what I'm sure would be the next YouTube hit. Sneaking up to the herd. And then jumping up and down screaming, sending these little beasts to the ground en masse. But then the vision changed. I imagined I was duped. There is no such thing as fainting goats. It was a ruse. I was misled to believe I'd be startling a bunch of defenseless animals into horizontal submission, only to discover that the startled herd would turn on me, en masse, and drive me screaming over the fence....captured on video like a cross between a Benny Hill sketch, and the Blair Goat project with closeups of my face as I run away in terror. And naturally, this would be a smash hit on YouTube.

Here's a link to the real thing...

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